Walkabout

My, my. I do like going out but I don't like how tired I get doing so. Suppose you have to pay the price!

I'm not tired during the day when doing stuff, it's just later that I am.

It's still rather cold in here. Oh well. Better than hot I suppose!

So, I just read some blogs. I am trying to focus on writing mine. I am tired lol And it is cold. Man. I'd put on the portable heater but I feel somewhat guilty doing that in June. Not supposed to need it right?

The problem is I sit by the window. Cold air comes thru. RM's computer is upstairs away from window; she is warmer. Oh well.

Nowhere else to use it .

Hard enough to focus when tired but cold takes the cake.

So focus

Town today, Newport

Left 8:30am, got there 9am
Walked to Bayfront, needed bathroom, so walked back up to Oceana
Got banana and ran into C on the way out. C is my RM's son who is home from college but living in town. Only met him once. Had very nice chat with him for 20-30 min. Enjoyed it quite a bit. Very polite, kind, amiable guy. Don't find that much in this age group.

Going to Oceana worked well because I figured I might go to Nye Beach next which I don't usually do or haven't recently. And because I knew if you went from Oceana two blocks over, you'd hit the highway and ice cream place and all you had to do was go down that road to get to Nye Beach.

And I was RIGHT!

Woohoo!

And so when I got there I was in a different part than I've usually been in. And I realized, lo and behold, there was a part of Nye Beach I had not explored yet. Whee! And lo and behold it was the best part of Nye Beach. Don't you hate when that happens?

If you go all the way to the east, the right, over a street from the bakery, there is a viewing platform of sorts for the ocean. There are concrete benches there, pretty ones adorned with the words Nye Beach and a symbol of a crab if I remember right. And OMG, the view, the view, the waves, it never stops being amazing. And so I didn't really feel like dealing with a sandy beach again as me and Sandy Beaches do NOT get along well. But just to sit and watch the beach and the waves roll in, it was like being at some kind of IMAX movie but in real life ya know...just beautiful. To sit and listen to the music and see this stunning sight from such a comfortable vantage point. Wow. Will have to go back there. Is usually windy down there but wasn't tomorrow, will have to check wind forecasts more often. Lots of people.

Anyway so tried to go to group of rocks but a stream of sorts seperated me from it. So lacking time as I was supposed to meet RM at 12 to go to Seal Rock, I left. And immediately got drawn into a street of shops I missed - this one much prettier and more enticing and charming than the other streets. The cobblestones - were they? I can't remember - maybe maybe not - reminded me almost of a street in the Old Port which made me feel very at home. It was but it wasn't. Anyway. A couple seafood resteraunts , one had a steak and shrimp combo that looked rather enticing. Got to the end of the street, nothing interesting, one more block, then I would figure out how to get back to Oceana to meet RM.

And then I saw it. Cafe Stephanie, Eat In or Take Out, it said. I figured any place already set up for take out was a good bet for being able to , well, take out something.... and I saw the open doorway in the back. People were bustling about so I asked for a take out menu. I was given one and looked at it.... Oh, heaven, chicken ceaser. Also had blackened salmon, remind me, I have to try that one next time - this one was so good I bet that would be even better - although they do tend to do really weird things to salmon here. I don't even know how salmon would taste in ceaser. Never tried it. But anyway. I digress. I was planning to make a note of it to come back to later as I was already late in meeting RM, but then I figured, how long could a chicken ceaser take? 10 min at most? I could still get back to Oceana by our planned leaving time of 12:30 if I waited ten minutes, so I decided to go for it, since it was lunch time and I was hungry.

I went back to the open door and lingered for a minute while I tried to figure out my game plan of how I was going to make my request in the somewhat unorthodox way of ordering through the delivery door. Screwing up the courage, I called through the door, "Excuse me. Is there any chance I can place an order?" The waitress didn't even blink or seem to think the request was odd, or ask me to come in. She asked what I wanted, and I said chicken ceaser; she said it'll be ready in two minutes. She came back out to give me the check to sign and get my card from me, and then a few minutes later came back out with the food. Talk about service! Service with a smile, prompt, quick, easy, and most amazing of all: the food was actually good. With a two minute prep time you'd think it would be cold, thrown together, unappetizing. And most chicken ceasers are a crapshoot at best; you never know what the quality of the chicken is going to be. Which reminds me, I don't think I ever ordered a chicken ceaser at Whole Foods in Portland. I should have. Theirs is good. Kept forgetting. Oh well. I knew I had had a good chicken ceaser somewhere in Portland. I wonder if the one in Bend will have one? Mmmmm. Anyway. Back to the story.

So, usually either the dressing is gross or the chicken is; some are edible but not remarkable. Most fall into that category.

This was actually GOOD! I opened the to-go container, wondering what I would find. The salad was visually pleasing; I grabbed a fork and started eating. The sharp, poignant, pleasant flavors of the ceaser dressing hit my mouth immediately. I tried the chicken. Hot and with a slight grilled flavor, tender, tasty! A miracle had been born: a chicken ceaser with decent chicken AND dressing and presentation .... an all around great salad. Newport, you're doing all right if you got me a decent chicken ceaser. I give much kudos for that.

So I sat at the sidewalk table and ate it. All of it. Every last morsel. I don't usually eat so much salad but that was damn good. I'll have to get it again.

Not that I like walking all the way to Nye Beach especially if it's windy out but that's a pretty good reason.

Oh yeah and then some woman with a dog came up immediately after that, peered thru the open delivery door, and said "Can I order from here? I have a dog so I can't come in." I said to her, "Hey, I just did that!" and she said, "Oh, do you have a dog, too?" I said no. She asked me if I ordered the chicken ceaser when she saw how much I liked it, and I said yes, and she ordered it too. I told her it was a good choice.

So I called RM to see when she wanted to go to Seal Rock, which we were going to do during her 12-4pm break from clients. A town 15 min away with a new beach. She said 1 would be fine so I made my way back slowly - and figured out how to get back from Nye Beach to Oceana, that's quite a feat, lol.
Remembered to go back up the street straight up from the PAC sign, and passed where I would turn off for her office, and kept going to the ice cream place. Then crossed the very difficult to cross highway, turned right, went down the street a little, and boom, I was at Oceana! It's so fun to actually know your way around and be able to figure out how to get places. It is such a feeling of satisfaction, I can't tell you.

So, RM's plans got changed a little as she had a client scheduled last munute for 2:45, but we still had a little time for Seal Rock. So off we went and got there by about 1:30, about 45 min to spend there.

Ugh, I just got all distracted. By happenings in the house. It hadnt broken my focus completely until the Internet stopped working. Dang Internet. Focus again.

Seal Rock: Beautiful beach as usual. Took some pictures I'll put up tomorrow. I don't always remember to put link in here but between Facebook and emails I think most of you see them, if not, just go to one of my albums already listed and on the top left hand it shoudl list any new ones I've put up. Original album is www.photobucket.com/newportoregon

Lots of rocks, pretty waves, some wave rock interaction....Not a whole lot to see to be honest in comparison with the other places but beautiful in its own way. Camera batteries died AGAIN after like half an hour so ran to get spare ones. Missed great shot of fisherman on the rocks against the ocean though. Oh well, got other ones.

Had only a short time but it was nice to see another beach. Heard Simon and Garfunkel's I am a Rock.

We thought we'd go toa a nearby cookie shop but they were closed.

When we got back to town, I sat in the car to make a phone call and rest. Called my friend D in New Hampshire, she is planning on coming out here in the middle of the month sometime. That will be good, I think. If she really comes, we shall see, and if I am still here, which is something I can't decide, which is somewhat driving me crazy.

We got back about 3, at 4 I set out my last mission for the day: getting ice cream. Mmmm. I
asked RM how to get to the ice cream place from Oceana and her directions didnt make sense to me verbally but when I tried to do what she said, it all fell into place and made sense! I got there without getting lost once! Perfect. You go down the street south of the office and it leads into the highway with the shops eventually. All these places are interconnected! The directions are starting to make sense! lol

I love that place more each time I go in... for some reason I can tolerate it, and it is so much fun being in an ice cream shop, especially one as good as this one. The expresso ice cream, which is homemade, has got to be a serious contender for the best ice cream I have ever had in my life. I was hesitant about giving it this title the first time or two I had it, but now that I've had it three times, I think I can honestly say this may be the case. The expresso flavor is strong and robust and HITS you in the mouth the SECOND you put it in your mouth, which is a sign of any good ice cream. And it never stops, the flavor is rich and amazing.

Their non homemade but still local to Oregon ice creams were good, but not a quarter as good as this one. There was no comparison. I sampled many of them. It was the first time I felt comfortable enough to stay in the store long enough to do any samples, and I was glad for that. The guy who waited on me was very nice.

Mmmm and then I decided I would go back to Oceana before meeting her at the office at 5, and I ACTUALLY KNEW HOW TO GET THERE TOO! Wooohoo, lol. Cross the highway and two blocks east. Used the bathroom, bought some cheap raspberries and vegetable rice crackers (my new favorite snack, but theyre addictive), and I KNEW HOW TO GET TO THE OFFICE FROM THERE! lol see a theme here? it's so fun to know how to navigate different parts of town on my own. I've always loved that about new cities or any city. Go down to where the flag is down the street, bear left, walk straight till you come to the intersection, go up a block...Something like that. Easy.

So, I now know how to get to Oceana, the office, the bayfront and Nye Beach to and from various points. The good part is not just knowing how to get to points A, B, C, and D from Point A; the good part is when you can generalize and get to B from C and C from D and A from B and so on. So that's kind of cool.

Left about 6.

I was afraid the humidity would be a problem as that has been a big problem for me lately; I didn't go outside for three days in a row because of it. It seems to be much worse here where the house is, inland, than it is on the ocean in Newport. There is no doubt it still bothered me in Newport today, but it was entirely tolerable, as long as I lowered my expectations waay down and didn't expect myself to do anything other than, well, walk. In other words if I had expected myself to enjoy it as much as I usually do I would have absolutely choked on the expectations. But if I just said "Go and do it" and did it, then I could pressure free. I sure wish I could do that with the rest of my life - free myself from expectations.

I had to keep moving more because sitting in one place and thinking about the air and the way it made me feel too much was not good....but it was okay - the important thing is to tailor each day to your individual needs that day. I had some ideas of what I wnated to do before I came but the ychanged as I realized what my needs and wants were - which is good .

I am struggling to decide when to go to Bend, either June 14, 26, or July 5 are my options.

because of weather related reasons and other minor issues I had basically decided to go the 14th as originally planned, but now I am way leanng the other way as I don't want to leave RM, I feel like I have so much more I can benefit from and learn from and enjoy from her. As long as the humidity is tolerable I think I will wait out the month. Two months is a nice even time to be soemwhere. We shall see. Also, my mom is supposed to come, and I am a little nervous about that. She is interviewing for a job in, of all places in the entire country, Eugene, which is 2 hrs from here and 2.5 hrs from Bend. So if she came she'd be smack in the middle of the two cities, which is kind of funny and rather convenient. But I am a little overwhelmed at the prospect of managing and navigating her stay, mainly because she will want to go places in a rental car and because of MCS I can't tolerate rental cars. I am very nervous about breaking this to her. She should know from previous experience, of course, but I don't expect her to remember. It's not much notice, it's either this Friday or next Friday I think. I hope it's next. Or maybe this Saturday. Who knows. It might be nice if she lived 2 hrs away and we could go hiking together sometimes, but I am a little nervous about this visit. Whatever, we shall see.

Okay I gave in and put the heater on, but at least I waited three hours to do so. I really do wish it was warmer in here at night. It would make focusing and relaxing so much easier. But what can you do right. I don't like this heater, it makes me somewhat groggy and hard to focus, but being cold is worse. And I'm not sure I should be asking RM to make a fire in June....but it is probably 50 degrees or so outside and no heat inside,so, it happens. Whatever.

My friend Deb said to me on the phone today "Kate, do you want to have happiness or peace?"
She was referring to my by now age old dilemma of trying to label things too much to decide for sure if I am happy or not - and she's probably right. I guess. Labeling is good for certain things and certain times but you can certainly go too far. In deciding that you don't need to label something and just want to experience it, whatever it is, then you will have peace.

I can do that sometimes and in some areas of my life but overall I find it a dificult task because the only way I make sense of my life is to label, describe, analyze, and so on.

But sometimes...Just being ok with whatever happens.....is much more peaceful.

Anyway something I'll have to remember and think about later.

Something I'm wondering about the leaving issue, you know, how much emotional growth will I miss out on with RM if I leave early? Balance that against humidity, no cell phone, so on.... I can't even remember....it's just that I need distraction on the days Im home.

But whatever....one day at a time.

Yawning, heat is making me super sleepy. Need to keep believing, be patient, it will come together. Do some writing if I can tomorrow. We will see. One day at a time.

I should be proud of msyelf for going out and having fun on a somewhat humid day where I had to get up early. I did good.

One day at a time.

Goodnight
Kate